Apr 08

Can rehab save your marriage?

Can rehab save your marriage?

Whether or not rehab can truly save your marriage all depends on the unique circumstance that you are in. Rehab is not a place to save relationships but is a place that offers alcoholics and addicts the care and attention they need to leave their alcoholism and addiction behind forever. It is possible to save your marriage once you get clean but the two are not one in the same. Whether it is too late or just in time, leaving behind an addiction and alcoholism can mean everything for your marriage.

Hopeful and desperate wives, husband and partners are one of the biggest reasons that many people decide to go to rehab. The reason they beg, plead and in the worst case scenarios threaten the relationship for you to go to rehab so somehow they can salvage your marriage. Spouses believe that marriage problems can and will be healed when your alcohol addiction is addressed. In some cases, rehab is a godsend for a marriage. Addicted and alcoholic husbands and wives get the care they need to get better and the spouses at home want to put the work in to get through the hard parts of recovery. In other cases it turns out that alcoholism and addiction was only one of the multiple problems within a marriage. In these marriages, while alcohol rehab can and will make a difference for the alcoholic or addicted spouse, rehab couldn’t and won’t save the marriage.

For the marriages that include the alcoholic or addicted spouse getting help and the spouse at home willing to put the work in, yes, rehab can save a marriage. Rehab can be the place where the addicted and alcoholic spouse gets clean, where apologies for mistakes during the drinking and using start, where the healing process can truly take hold and this can help save a marriage if both parties are willing to put in the effort. Rehab is also the place where family therapy happens and that can really help to save a marriage. Of course with all marriages, it takes work and time, and even after rehab if you want to save your marriage, you are going to need to continue going to therapy.

While rehab can save your marriage in some instances there are some things that rehab definitely cannot do for it. Rehab’s main purpose is to help you get medical and psychological treatment for addiction and alcoholism, point blank. Rehab’s goal is not to save your marriage but save you. No one can and nothing can save a marriage but the two people in it who are willing to do what it takes to salvage it. That means that rehab cannot make you or your spouse go get therapeutic care, stay sober, attend therapy, or go to codependency groups etc. The action and work has to be done by the two people in the marriage, rehab can just give you a good starting point if the effort and willingness is there.

Mar 04

How To Tell Your Kids You’re Going to Rehab

How To Tell Your Kids You're Going to Rehab

How To Tell Your Kids You’re Going to Rehab

Making the decision to go to rehab is the first crucial step in beating an addiction. Once you make the decision, however, there are some other things you must take care of before you leave. What to tell your kids depends in large part about how old they are. If they are in their late teens or twenties, you may be able to tell them in the same way that you tell the rest of your family. If they are older, they are probably well aware of the problem, and will be relieved to know you are going to get help. Make sure to find out when they can visit or call, and make sure they know you will keep in touch as much as you can.

If your child is a little younger, however, they may have more trouble understanding. Here are some tips that can help you tell your kids you’re going to rehab:

How To Tell Your Kids You’re Going to Rehab:  Explain that addiction is a disease

Sit down with your kids and explain that addiction is a disease, and that you need help to get better. Tell them you are going to a special place where good people will help you get better. This way, they will understand that you need to go, but that you will be getting better while you are gone. This will make it easier on them when you tell your kids you’re going to rehab.

How To Tell Your Kids You’re Going to Rehab: Talk about the rehab

Kids usually feel better when they know what’s going on. When you tell your kids you’re going to rehab, show them pictures of the place that you are going. Talk about what you will do during a day in treatment. Talk about the time you’ll get up, when you’ll eat, the therapies you’ll be involved in. Make sure they understand that you won’t be able to talk to on the phone or visit them very often, especially in the beginning.

How To Tell Your Kids You’re Going to Rehab: Make a plan

While you are gone, you may not have control over when you will be allowed to contact your children. Make sure that they know you will call every chance you get. If you can, find out from the treatment center when you will have access to the phone, when you will be able to send letters, and when family will be allowed to visit. Let your kids know when you will be able to contact them, maybe mark it on the calendar. Plan ahead for visiting day, and decide together what you will do when they come. This will make it easier when you tell your kids you’re going to rehab.

How To Tell Your Kids You’re Going to Rehab: Manage your emotions

It is difficult to tell your kids you’re going to rehab, but it will be better for them if you can manage your emotions when you talk to them about it. Crying or becoming extremely upset may make it harder on them. As much as you can, try to remain calm and optimistic when you tell your kids you’re going to rehab.

Nov 02

How to tell your husband you’re going to rehab

How to tell your husband youre going to rehab

How to tell your husband you’re going to rehab

The truth of the matter is that if you have been in living with your husband and/or seeing him in any sort of regular basis during your addiction, he more than likely already knows you have a problem with addiction and need rehab. As addicts, we often think we are hiding our drug use and drinking from the people we care about the most but in reality, it’s actually quite obvious. Addiction is a disease that can only be hidden for so long, and then the signs become absolutely impossible to cover up. Anyone who knew you before addiction took control of your life already knows that something is terribly wrong, especially your husband.

When you begin to come up with what you want to say to your husband about going to rehab, it’s probably best to assume that your husband already knows you are struggling with a drug or alcohol addiction. When you stop to think about it, it is likely he has even attempted to talk to you about your addiction in the past. Don’t insult his intelligence by denying how long you have been trying to cover your tracks. Be honest with him, and he will be more receptive to the conversation.

The most important part of telling your husband you’re going to rehab will be the part where you tell him what you are going to do to help yourself. You are going to want to tell him how sorry you are for any hurt you caused him and you can do, but you should also have some information to share with him about getting into a drug alcohol rehab.

You need to explain to him that you are ready and willing to acknowledge your addiction and that you are going to go to rehab. More importantly, you need to share with your husband that you are ready to get better and go to rehab. You may not have all the answers to give your husband about going to rehab about where or when you will enter into drug rehab center or maybe you will. But all you need to convey is that you are ready to do what needs to be done in order to get your life back and your relationship with him back. This is how you will tell your husband you’re going to rehab.

Your husband may be upset with some of the things you have done during your struggle with addiction, but he will always love you so the fact that you are getting help and going to rehab is probably going to be of comfort to him. The conversation you have with your husband about going to rehab and to admit you are an addict may be a difficult discussion, but it is one that you have to face and you will be glad you did.

Once your husband sees you are being honest and humble, he will most likely be more than willing to help you through going to rehab and provide you with a great support system during your drug alcohol rehab. Once you have this conversation with your husband about going to rehab, you will be surprised at his reaction and how much more prepared you are to finally change your life for the better.